Now let me start off by saying that I understand the mechanics of sabering open a bottle. INTELLECTUALLY. I have been instructed on the technique, I have watched videos, I know what I am supposed to do. And it didn't work. When I started out, I had one deadly weapon in my hands, at the end I had two. The bottle of cava was transformed into a weapon worthy of a late night, old West bar brawl. Or a really gory, eyeball popping slasher flick.
Here's the brief (but shameful) video:
If you can detect what I did wrong here, by all means, leave a comment below. I am thinking that perhaps I need a blade with a thicker spine. I figured the flat of a machete would be more dramatic than using a Chef knife. Or maybe I should have only submerged the neck of the bottle in the ice bucket rather than the whole thing. Oh, well. Perhaps I'll have better luck next time. We still drank it.
The bottle was a Brut Cava from Rondel, a bargain at Total Wine for only 7.99, and packaged in an attractive (and maybe prohibitively heavy gauge glass?) blue bottle. While I prefer the Semi-Seco from the same family when I am making Mimosas, Bellinis or even French 75's ( I like the sweetness in cases like those), when I want it unadulterated and dry, I go for the Brut.
Well, seeing as it was a friendly occasion, the jagged bottle went safely into the recycling bin instead of the face of someone who affronted me with a perceived slight to my honour. That might result in the absence of a return invitation. And considering this is a pretty cool party, I want a return invitation, and I have an innate aversion to arrests and lawsuits.
So again, thanks Kris and Nate, for the hospitality and good times, and I apologize for the shattered glass strewn across your driveway. Perhaps I'll have better luck at your Better Than XMAS Party.